On 9th July South Sudan becomes the world's newest baby nation, and Juba is preparing. The airport is currently a one-storey hut with one room for leaving and one for arriving; luggage is tossed through a hole in the wall. The skeleton of a huge new terminal building has been slowly growing over the last three years but work is now going on round the clock to transform it into a shimmering temple to aviation that will no doubt collapse on top of the thirty heads of state due to arrive for the party.
The shabby countdown to referendum clock tower has been replaced by a swish countdown to independence clock tower donated by the Chinese, who I'm sure don't want anything in return for the $9bn they've donated to the baby shower. I believe this money has been earmarked for several enormous guns which will be taken to the border and pointed at North Sudan. Anything left over may go on ministerial stretch Hummers, or perhaps a monorail.
You'll have noticed that North Sudan, upset to be losing a good chunk of itself, isn't playing ball with the independence celebrations and has been bombing the hell out of selected Southern towns. At the moment it is refusing to hand over the region of Abyei, like a jilted lover who won't face facts and refuses to return a favourite borrowed sweater.
A consequence of Khartoum's moodiness is that there are dire shortages of fuel, food and premium-strength European lager. The fuel problem is hitting Juba hardest, and hoarders are filling up spare bins, washing up bowls and wellington boots in the belief that it will get worse. Some petrol stations are refusing to allow you to fill jerry cans, but this isn't a problem as no one will notice if you get your driver to make several trips and spend half his day lying under the car syphoning petrol into empty baked bean tins.
The shabby countdown to referendum clock tower has been replaced by a swish countdown to independence clock tower donated by the Chinese, who I'm sure don't want anything in return for the $9bn they've donated to the baby shower. I believe this money has been earmarked for several enormous guns which will be taken to the border and pointed at North Sudan. Anything left over may go on ministerial stretch Hummers, or perhaps a monorail.
You'll have noticed that North Sudan, upset to be losing a good chunk of itself, isn't playing ball with the independence celebrations and has been bombing the hell out of selected Southern towns. At the moment it is refusing to hand over the region of Abyei, like a jilted lover who won't face facts and refuses to return a favourite borrowed sweater.
A consequence of Khartoum's moodiness is that there are dire shortages of fuel, food and premium-strength European lager. The fuel problem is hitting Juba hardest, and hoarders are filling up spare bins, washing up bowls and wellington boots in the belief that it will get worse. Some petrol stations are refusing to allow you to fill jerry cans, but this isn't a problem as no one will notice if you get your driver to make several trips and spend half his day lying under the car syphoning petrol into empty baked bean tins.
What a fascinating time to be out there. I'm really enjoying reading you posts.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry we missed when you were last over, Si - let's definitely do that pint in August, as I'd love to hear the unbloggable stories! :)
PW